Dad's Cancer Has Not Spread

I can not even begin to imagine the relief my dad must feel today. He met with the oncologist for the results of the PET scan that he had on Friday and they do not believe that the cancer has spread to any of his organs - WHICH IS SUCH GREAT NEWS!!!!

He will have to have another PET scan in six months to ensure that there wasn't something small that was missed.

He goes to Blumenthal Cancer Center in Charlotte, NC tomorrow to start the clinical trial for the Melanoma. The oncologist told Dad this morning that this particular clinical trial would not be administering any placebos - so he will definitely be receiving treatment.

Things are looking up! This has been a horrible three weeks. I've been so overwhelmed with worry and sadness. Loosing Maggie was so much harder than I ever thought it would be and then to have the worry of Dad's prognosis on top of it... not to mention dealing with Gran.

Dad and I did a conference call to talk with Gran yesterday about 6pm... we talked with her for 15-20 minutes. We talked about him getting the results of his tests today, we talked about Katie, we talked about a number of things. She talked about how it brightened her day that we called.

Then, at 6:30... she called me..."Leeann...(long pause)... I forgot why I called you...(another pause) - oh, have you heard from your dad this weekend?" I reminded her that we had just talked to her ten minutes ago... she didn't remember it... any of it. She swore it didn't happen.

I took her out to dinner with Katie and I on Saturday evening to Outback. When I got her in the car after dinner, I got in the car and started it and she said "Oh Leeann, is this your purse?" No, I had my purse... "Gran, it must be yours"... "No, it's not mine"... so I get out of the car and go to the backseat because I was worried that somehow, she'd picked up the wrong handbag... no, it was the handbag she's carried for years!!

The court hearing for the conservatorship has been postponed until April 16th because there was a conflict with the guardian ad litem.

In any case, at least there was a huge bright spot today! Thank you so much for your prayers, friendship and support.

I'll keep you posted!
LA :)

Happy Easter!

Dad Update

My dad went back to the surgical oncologist, Dr. Bebb, this morning. News was slightly better than we'd prepared for but still very serious. The biopsy came back on the three lymph nodes and 2 were benign and 1 was cancerous. The concern is that the lymph node that the cancer spread to apparently is a lymph node that will almost have a starburst type affect with spreading. So now the concern is where else has the cancer spread to....? My dad will have a PET scan done sometime next week to determine if and where.

Dr. Bebb told Dad flat out this morning that he was going to have to fight for his life in the upcoming year. He's going to have radiation, irregardless of whether it has spread anywhere else. He's also going to have to have additional lymph nodes removed amd he may also loose his right ear. I'm still not completely clear on all the details... which is frustrating.

Dr. Bebb has already submitted Dad for a clinical trial in Charlotte that will require them being in Charlotte twice a week for three months. This is also going to be dependent on what the PET scan shows.

Dad and Marilyn are so overwhelmed and they don't ask a lot of questions. I wish I could be there to help out... but I have my hands full with Katie and Gran.

Thank you so much for all your emails, prayers, love and support! Please keep praying for my dad. He didn't handle the news that well but seems to be determined to let it sink in today and start tomorrow with a FIGHT!

Leeann

I'll Miss My Little Maggie

Just this side of heaven is a place called Rainbow Bridge.

When an animal dies that has been especially close to someone here, that pet goes to Rainbow Bridge. There are meadows and hills for all of our special friends so they can run and play together. There is plenty of food, water and sunshine, and our friends are warm and comfortable. All the animals who had been ill and old are restored to health and vigor. Those who were hurt or maimed are made whole and strong again, just as we remember them in our dreams of days and times gone by. The animals are happy and content, except for one small thing; they each miss someone very special to them, who had to be left behind.

They all run and play together, but the day comes when one suddenly stops and looks into the distance. His bright eyes are intent. His eager body quivers. Suddenly he begins to run from the group, flying over the green grass, his legs carrying him faster and faster.

You have been spotted, and when you and your special friend finally meet, you cling together in joyous reunion, never to be parted again. The happy kisses rain upon your face; your hands again caress the beloved head, and you look once more into the trusting eyes of your pet, so long gone from your life but never absent from your heart.

Then you cross Rainbow Bridge together....

Bad News

Not 30 minutes after I posted my blog entry yesterday, Marilyn called me sobbing. Apparently, the surgical oncologist had to remove far more from my dad's scalp than he originally was planning. The mapping procedure that they did yesterday morning showed the lymph nodes where the cancer has spread to... and he went in deep to remove those lymph nodes. Dad and Marilyn were under the impression that this mapping procedure would show if the cancer had spread... now Marilyn realizes that the surgeon knew it had spread and this was done to show him exactly where.

He told Marilyn that my dad is going to have his back up against in a wall in making a decision on whether to procede with a clinical trial (one specifically in Houston, TX) or take a more traditional approach but the reality and that statistics are shocking and I'm reeling, trying to come to terms with what is happening.



I had not taken all of this very seriously until yesterday, as there is someone in my life that is 80 years old who was recently diagnosed (16 months ago) with Stage 4 melanoma and it had not spread to his lymph nodes, he had the tumor removed and is now cancer free and has a good prognosis. Now, I'm wandering if in fact he did have Stage 4 melanoma after all - because after doing some reading yesterday and today - you are only given the diagnosis of Stage 4 when it has indeed spread.

The surgeon yesterday really gave Marilyn a grim prognosis yesterday. The lymph nodes still have to be officially biopsied and those results should be back on Monday because he put a rush on it; however, he told Marilyn that he's been doing this many years and that she needed to be prepared for the worst.

These are the statistics for Stage 4 Melanoma when it has spread to the lymph nodes:

The five year survival rate is 14%.
The average survival time frame is 13 months.
The survival rate with the average clinical trial for Stage 4 Melanoma is 5%.

Please keep my dad in your thoughts and prayers.

LA

Wake Me When It's Finally Spring

*sigh* I know my friends and family are tired of hearing me complain about wanting spring to be here... but seriously!!!



We actually had a nice spring like day both Wednesday and Thursday but I didn't see the outside of the house because Katie is sick. She has croup. Yuck! She's been puny and hasn't felt good at all since late Tuesday night. She missed school Wed, Thur and today! Now, she is on spring break until March 25th. Surely we will have some nice weather to do some nice things outside in the coming week.

My dad is having surgery right now. Marilyn called to say that the scan they did pre-opt for any additional signs of cancer came back negative. His biopsy(s) on the other places they removed and his lymph nodes came back benign. He is so blessed and lucky to have had stage 4 melanoma and all the other places and everything to have come back negative. I'm so relieved and I could hear the relief in her voice!!

I'll be looking goofy in the coming years wearing hats, sunscreen and being pale. I will no longer be lounging in the sun. I've always liked getting a little golden tint to my skin and I love relaxing by the pool or the ocean in the warmth of the sun reading a book... no more! It's just not worth it. Maybe I'll try those bronzers...?

I also have the court date set for the legal stuff with my grandmother. It is Wednesday, April 2nd.

When is Disney!? I'm so ready!!! May 6th!!! Can't believe Katie will be turning 9. It's her last year in the single digits!

It Helps If You Were Married To A Redneck!

Don and I spent a very fun evening with Lisa and Rick Saturday night while Katie was at vision camp. We went out for a nice dinner and then spent the rest of the evening playing games and laughing so hard!! We played Battle of the Sexes. How fun!! Of course, we played girls against the guys! I don't even think I remember who won - we had so much fun!

So many of the dog gone questions directed at the girls were fishing related questions. It was hilarious how much Lisa knew about fishing!! She said numerous times "It helps if you were married to a redneck"... since her first husband was a big fisherman.



On the flip side of things - it was a little scary how much Don knew about the women's questions. Rick did well but Don knew just a little too much...we kept teasing him telling him he was a "metro sexual".



Katie did well at vision camp and can't wait for next year. Her counselor from last year, Amy was there and remembered Katie the minute we walked in the door. All the counselors are UT students and her major was political science until she did vision camp last year and then she made a BIG change to therapeutic recreation. So this year, she was back in a leadership role.

Katie's counselor this year, Amanda is already in therapeutic rec for her major and her and Katie got along great!! Katie got to ride horses (which she never gets to do and was so excited ;)) She got to do a zip line, lots of arts and crafts. They had a dance on Saturday night and Katie was a Cheetah Girl and Amanda dressed up like a rock and roll roadie and was her manager!

Don and I had a date Friday night just the two of us. We went to see Vantage Point - which has gotten terrible reviews but we were entertained. LOL... it doesn't take much these days. Then we had a nice dinner out. It was really nice - that is twice in five weeks that we've had some time as just a couple overnight knowing that Katie was happy and well taken care of. She spent two nights with Mom and MomMom back in February.

On a less happy note - I continue to struggle with my weight loss plateau. I actually gained a pound and a half. I'm reading Valerie Bertinelli's book "Losing It". I almost read the entire book yesterday. I talked with my RN practitioner who has been so supportive of my weight loss and helped a lot with my pre-surgical approval. She is very encouraging talking about how substantially better my health is now than it was even a year ago. But, I'm still noticing a tenancy to have an emotional connection to food - and I really see it now reading VB's book.

I definitely have a bruised rib and I'm really sore. I can't laugh without it hurting. Coughing, sneezing, pulling up jeans, rolling over in my sleep, bending over, etc send me into orbit. *sigh* Apparently it takes 3-4 weeks for it to heal so that's not very encouraging. It's starting to be very spring like and I'm so ready to hit the outdoors!!

Maggie continues not to do well at all. She's barely eating and continuing to get sick. We are still working with Dr. Cheadle to try and find a resolution or to at least make Maggie as comfortable as possible.

Dad gets the results today on the biopsy on his lymph nodes. Please keep him in your thoughts and prayers. I talked with Marilyn last night and she did confirm that he has Stage 4 Melanoma. His lymph nodes were very swollen last week when they did the biopsy. He's scheduled for surgery this Friday - the 14th but that may change based on the results today. If the results today aren't good - a new course is going to be plotted. My dad is healthy in every other respect so hopefully - even if the news isn't good - he will be a strong fighter and things will go well.

Happy Springlike Tuesday!!
LA :)

So Happy To Be Spending Time On The Farm Again

Monday, it was a very breezy spring like day and Don and I went to the farm and spent several hours with Sunny and Belle. It was great!! So happy to be spending time out there again other than mucking Belle's stall.

I took my camera on Monday and while Don ran Sunny and Belle for exercise I snapped away! I came home with 800+ pictures... so I tried to extract 50 or so of the best ones in this slide show to one of my favorite songs by Natasha Bedingfield.



I made another pretty stupid mistake and got hurt a little bit - no head injury this time. Just another reminder that Sunny and Belle aren't "pets" - they are 1200 pound unpredictable creatures.

I haven't ridden Belle since November. I've spent a lot of time with her and she is doing great! She's definitely my horse - she can be WAY out in the pasture and when I pull up to the barn - she starts heading in!

Katie is still doing great at STAR! They've really been doing a lot with her and her balance and working with her looking directly at the person that is talking to her. This has carried over and even helped some in school.



Katie has started gymnastics again. My friend S has two daughters that are in the same class with Katie! The gymnastics teacher is wonderful and she's great with Katie! I'm so glad that I found out about it through S... plus - she and I get to hang out while the girls are doing their thing. I discovered today that it's the fastest hour of my week... we are like teenagers... giggling and cutting up! So glad she is my friend!

I am trying to start taking my camera every where I go - literally. I'm working on building my portfolio and I'm currently working on my website. I have three more classes at UT this spring - not all at once but it will be busy!

Also, I am going to Huntsville, AL in a few weeks. My friend, Court, found this awesome photographer - actually it's a husband and wife team - like what Don and I hope to eventually do... they joined forces and have a studio. He's a videographer and editor and she's a photographer. Every other month, they have a small conference for new photographers and they mentor the photog's to help them get going... as long as they live far enough away to not be competition... :)

It's FREE! Isn't that crazy? This lady - Heather Bookout - feels like she's been blessed and wants to give back! I'm always wanting to learn - she seems very talented and you can't beat FREE!

More later!
LA :)

Does This Clutter Make My Butt Look Fat?

Apparently, this is a book that has recently been released by Peter Walsh. I tivo'd him on Oprah like two weeks ago and had been procrastinating on watching it because I've been so blue about how cluttered our home has become and I've also been blue about my weight loss stalling...

So, this past weekend... Don and I got our butts in gear and decluttered - ALOT! We gave our way too large kitchen table and large leather living room sofa to Knox Rescue Ministries - which they were very pleased to get. We now just have two nice leather chairs with ottomans in our living room with two slim pottery barn style chairs and it is so much more open and spacious. We got a small round table for the kitchen which also made a big difference.

We also cleaned out our laundry room, the family room and our bedroom closets... we had a TON of things in our carport Monday morning for Habitat for Humanity to pick up. We got rid of that video storage cube that was so huge in the family room and now we have room for our exercise equipment to not be folded up...

So, now I feel less cluttered and ready to watch this show and get re-motivated on my weight loss! *sigh*

It's time to start picking out spring clothes! I want to be in a size 12 when I am shopping...

Eventually, I want to be in an 8... but I've learned to set my short term goals and shoot for them instead of looking at the end goal.

More later!
LA :)