Templeton Thompson is one of my new favorite artist. Her, Mary Ann Kennedy and Katie Drake have some great music for horse lovers!
The song in my video is Templeton Thompson's "A Horse That Can Fly". I'd like to believe that Belle really is in heaven running through beautiful pastures waiting for me to ride her bareback one day.
I can't imagine a heaven with no horses. They are truly God's most beautiful creation.
There is an old Arabian proverb..."The wind of heaven is that which blows between a horse's ears".
I might have to move Lakota to a different farm because of his injury and what's needed for his recouperation. It's made me so sad because I've started building such good friendships at this farm and I can literally just pop out there, spend 1/2 hour with Lakota when I can. I'm literally getting to see him almost every day and work with him a LOT!!!
I know that's caused me to be more emotional but I also never really grieved loosing Belle. I threw myself into finding another horse and I'm glad that I did... I would have Lakota... and he's AMAZING!!
But I do miss Belle!
LA :)
Sunday, March 29, 2009
Wednesday, March 25, 2009
Taking A Break
It's been a gloomy rainy day and all I've done since 7:30am is numbers, numbers, numbers so I'm taking a little break and letting my eyes and fingers focus on words instead of numbers for a few.
This is the one time of year that I actually don't like working from home. A day like today - it was hard to fight taking a nap... especially when my eyes glazed over and got blurry. Also, it's hard when Katie comes home from school and I'd like to shut my laptop and spend time with her but I'm under the gun and can't!
Don went out in the mud and rain and walked my boy around this morning! Such a great husband! He's gonna do it again for me tomorrow and then hopefully I'll be able to be back taking care of Lakota.
Dad is home from the hospital! His spirits are so good!! He says he's in a lot of pain but he was making jokes and being him! Marilyn is tired and is not in as good of spirits. I wish I could do something to cheer her a little. I know this is hard for her... she's afraid. She's already lost one husband in her life and now she's being faced with that again!! We just have to be firm in our faith that no one leaves this earth until it's their time and God is in control! If you don't believe that... living through the scare of loosing someone you love so much would drive you insane!!
A few people, family and friends, have asked me recently how I can be so open on my blog and talk so freely about personal family things and my weight, etc...? I'm just an open person (now at least... I didn't use to be).
In 2009, it's hard to have secrets from anyone. You can't even keep private what the front of your house looks like... it's on Google. You can't really have an unlisted number... even if you are paying for it. Just ask the creditors who have tracked me down for my grandparents.
Why hide? Why not be open!? I've been making far more friends and acquaintances since I've opened up my world and it's made me a much happier person. Don is finding the same to be true for him too!
I think even though I haven't reached my goal weight and I've struggled the past year trying to get/stay motivated to loose these last 40 pounds... I still feel such an accomplishment, feel so much better and have so much more confidence in myself, my abilities and what I can do in life.
I'm sure that's definitely contributed to me being much more open.
I'll keep updates posted on Dad!
LA :)
This is the one time of year that I actually don't like working from home. A day like today - it was hard to fight taking a nap... especially when my eyes glazed over and got blurry. Also, it's hard when Katie comes home from school and I'd like to shut my laptop and spend time with her but I'm under the gun and can't!
Don went out in the mud and rain and walked my boy around this morning! Such a great husband! He's gonna do it again for me tomorrow and then hopefully I'll be able to be back taking care of Lakota.
Dad is home from the hospital! His spirits are so good!! He says he's in a lot of pain but he was making jokes and being him! Marilyn is tired and is not in as good of spirits. I wish I could do something to cheer her a little. I know this is hard for her... she's afraid. She's already lost one husband in her life and now she's being faced with that again!! We just have to be firm in our faith that no one leaves this earth until it's their time and God is in control! If you don't believe that... living through the scare of loosing someone you love so much would drive you insane!!
A few people, family and friends, have asked me recently how I can be so open on my blog and talk so freely about personal family things and my weight, etc...? I'm just an open person (now at least... I didn't use to be).
In 2009, it's hard to have secrets from anyone. You can't even keep private what the front of your house looks like... it's on Google. You can't really have an unlisted number... even if you are paying for it. Just ask the creditors who have tracked me down for my grandparents.
Why hide? Why not be open!? I've been making far more friends and acquaintances since I've opened up my world and it's made me a much happier person. Don is finding the same to be true for him too!
I think even though I haven't reached my goal weight and I've struggled the past year trying to get/stay motivated to loose these last 40 pounds... I still feel such an accomplishment, feel so much better and have so much more confidence in myself, my abilities and what I can do in life.
I'm sure that's definitely contributed to me being much more open.
I'll keep updates posted on Dad!
LA :)
Tuesday, March 24, 2009
Please pray for my dad
He had his surgery this morning and it went wonderfully according to the doctor. However, his surgical oncologist says that it is not good that the cancer has recurred at what they call a "distant recurrence" and he is surprised that my father survived a year. He said that because of this recurrence it will most likely continue to spread.
They are going to send the tumor that they removed from his stomach off to try and come up with a designer chemo to treat it. The success rate for this is less than 10%.
The odds are closing in on my pop so please keep him in your prayers!
LA
They are going to send the tumor that they removed from his stomach off to try and come up with a designer chemo to treat it. The success rate for this is less than 10%.
The odds are closing in on my pop so please keep him in your prayers!
LA
Monday, March 23, 2009
Just What I Needed
A wonderful day with my great husband and some farm time with Lakota. The weather was beautiful too... so nice and so needed!
This past week has been a little tough... actually a lot tough! We tried a new medicine with KT that did not do well at all and so we've changed back. Dad's visit was hard... because I'm so worried about him. He has his surgery tomorrow. If any of you watch Grey's Anatomy... my father has the very same condition as Izzy... Metastatic Melanoma. Only, it has not spread to his brain... but it is spreading and I'm so concerned for him.
I thought the pre-tax work that I do for my clients this year was going to be a breeze because everything has been incredibly more organized and under control this year but seemingly - that is not the case and I'm working 10+ hour days when I'd much rather be outside.
So, last week was tough. Sleep was rough. Days with Katie should have been fun - It Was Spring Break For Pete's Sake - but it was LONG and hard! The only fun she and I had was a quick shopping trip on Thursday afternoon and a picnic with my good friend Sheila and her two beautiful daughters!
On top of everything else - Lakota got injured last Monday while Dad was still here. Nothing severe but he got hurt and then was in his stall for three days strait because of horrible weather and that made the injury worse.
Then I had a major car repair and I'm not even going to touch on things with Gran... but it isn't good!
So, needless to say I was SOOOOO looking forward to having a nice breakfast with Don this morning and then heading to the farm. I did an hour of ground work with Lakota before the vet arrived at 11am and he is such a quick learner and does so well... except he threw a little horsey temper tantrum today. But just like the terrible twos, it was over almost before it began and I wasn't on his back at the time... so it was OK.
But then, boy, poor Lakota didn't know what hit him. The vet really worked him over. Heavily sedated and still standing, he was injected with a synthetic blister into his "right left" leg. Yes, that is what I told the vet... that it was his "right left" leg that was injured.
The blister will expand and cause pressure on his tendons and muscles, causing them to strengthen. I have to exercise him daily this week from the ground and then I have doctor's orders to try and ride him daily starting next Monday. Those are doctors orders that I can try to abide by! :)
His leg is going to be in a lot of pain this week. He's not going to want to be worked... so that will be loads of fun. He also had his teeth floated and his wolf teeth pulled AND all of his shots. I thought the vet bill was going to be ASTRONOMICAL but it wasn't as much as Brinkley's vet bill in February.
Poor guy really got it good this morning but he did great and it only took him like 15 minutes to shake off the sedatives.
It was really funny though because he couldn't walk a strait line for a while and his lips were numb... so he'd go to try and eat grass and his lips would just flap together. Then he would snort!
Anyway, it was a BEAUTIFUL morning and I had some much needed time with Don and it was fun being at the farm for the better part of the day... even though it involved my Lakota being tortured... :)
I'll have to post soon about Lakota's smoky noise! You know, Smoky the Smoke Monster from LOST... Lakota has his spooky noise down pat! Totally cracks Don and I up.
Maybe tomorrow!
LA :)
This past week has been a little tough... actually a lot tough! We tried a new medicine with KT that did not do well at all and so we've changed back. Dad's visit was hard... because I'm so worried about him. He has his surgery tomorrow. If any of you watch Grey's Anatomy... my father has the very same condition as Izzy... Metastatic Melanoma. Only, it has not spread to his brain... but it is spreading and I'm so concerned for him.
I thought the pre-tax work that I do for my clients this year was going to be a breeze because everything has been incredibly more organized and under control this year but seemingly - that is not the case and I'm working 10+ hour days when I'd much rather be outside.
So, last week was tough. Sleep was rough. Days with Katie should have been fun - It Was Spring Break For Pete's Sake - but it was LONG and hard! The only fun she and I had was a quick shopping trip on Thursday afternoon and a picnic with my good friend Sheila and her two beautiful daughters!
On top of everything else - Lakota got injured last Monday while Dad was still here. Nothing severe but he got hurt and then was in his stall for three days strait because of horrible weather and that made the injury worse.
Then I had a major car repair and I'm not even going to touch on things with Gran... but it isn't good!
So, needless to say I was SOOOOO looking forward to having a nice breakfast with Don this morning and then heading to the farm. I did an hour of ground work with Lakota before the vet arrived at 11am and he is such a quick learner and does so well... except he threw a little horsey temper tantrum today. But just like the terrible twos, it was over almost before it began and I wasn't on his back at the time... so it was OK.
But then, boy, poor Lakota didn't know what hit him. The vet really worked him over. Heavily sedated and still standing, he was injected with a synthetic blister into his "right left" leg. Yes, that is what I told the vet... that it was his "right left" leg that was injured.
The blister will expand and cause pressure on his tendons and muscles, causing them to strengthen. I have to exercise him daily this week from the ground and then I have doctor's orders to try and ride him daily starting next Monday. Those are doctors orders that I can try to abide by! :)
His leg is going to be in a lot of pain this week. He's not going to want to be worked... so that will be loads of fun. He also had his teeth floated and his wolf teeth pulled AND all of his shots. I thought the vet bill was going to be ASTRONOMICAL but it wasn't as much as Brinkley's vet bill in February.
Poor guy really got it good this morning but he did great and it only took him like 15 minutes to shake off the sedatives.
It was really funny though because he couldn't walk a strait line for a while and his lips were numb... so he'd go to try and eat grass and his lips would just flap together. Then he would snort!
Anyway, it was a BEAUTIFUL morning and I had some much needed time with Don and it was fun being at the farm for the better part of the day... even though it involved my Lakota being tortured... :)
I'll have to post soon about Lakota's smoky noise! You know, Smoky the Smoke Monster from LOST... Lakota has his spooky noise down pat! Totally cracks Don and I up.
Maybe tomorrow!
LA :)
Saturday, March 21, 2009
When You Think You Are Getting To Sleep Late On A Saturday Morning...
and you have a child under the age of 10... BEWARE!
For this is what your child may choose for breakfast!!
*sigh*
LA :)
For this is what your child may choose for breakfast!!
*sigh*
LA :)
Sunday, March 15, 2009
Damn Statistics & Prognoses
Dad and Marilyn came to visit Friday afternoon. Dad had a long, tough week of appointments last week. Pet scan, biopsies, ultrasounds and then bad news. Right as he was driving into Knoxville, his surgical oncologist called with the news that his Melanoma had returned and it's on his stomach... internal!
This is not good!
The interferon treatment that Dad suffered through last year was suppose to drastically reduce the chance of recurrence... or to at least provide a greater length of time before recurrence.
So, it's back under the knife for Dad on March 24th!
He seems to be taking it far better than I ever would have thought! Marilyn not so much! Dad thought he was gonna have to take her to the ER after getting off the phone with the doctor. She pretty much had a panic attack and then fell apart totally when they got here.
She almost thought she was having a heart attack!!
We did a lot of research yesterday online. We don't know much yet... not sure if he's gonna do radiation again, interferon... hoping that immunotherapy might be an option. Results seem to be phenomenal with immunotherapy!
I'll update as things progress!!
But, I will say... the prognoses for recurrence so quickly and at a distant location (his original melanoma was on his scalp and Stage IV)... this melanoma is inside his stomach. Not sure what stage... but the statistics are grim.
Funny thing... Izzy on Grey's Anatomy has just gotten a grim diagnosis of Metastatic Melanoma. Her odds of survival more than a few months in TV land is less than 5%. But as one of her interns pointed out... the survival rate of getting the hiccups is 100% and a patient died on the show from the hiccups.
Strange things in life happen. We never know whats around the corner... what tomorrow holds.
None of us are promised tomorrow. But hopefully, my dad will have quite a few!
LA :)
This is not good!
The interferon treatment that Dad suffered through last year was suppose to drastically reduce the chance of recurrence... or to at least provide a greater length of time before recurrence.
So, it's back under the knife for Dad on March 24th!
He seems to be taking it far better than I ever would have thought! Marilyn not so much! Dad thought he was gonna have to take her to the ER after getting off the phone with the doctor. She pretty much had a panic attack and then fell apart totally when they got here.
She almost thought she was having a heart attack!!
We did a lot of research yesterday online. We don't know much yet... not sure if he's gonna do radiation again, interferon... hoping that immunotherapy might be an option. Results seem to be phenomenal with immunotherapy!
I'll update as things progress!!
But, I will say... the prognoses for recurrence so quickly and at a distant location (his original melanoma was on his scalp and Stage IV)... this melanoma is inside his stomach. Not sure what stage... but the statistics are grim.
Funny thing... Izzy on Grey's Anatomy has just gotten a grim diagnosis of Metastatic Melanoma. Her odds of survival more than a few months in TV land is less than 5%. But as one of her interns pointed out... the survival rate of getting the hiccups is 100% and a patient died on the show from the hiccups.
Strange things in life happen. We never know whats around the corner... what tomorrow holds.
None of us are promised tomorrow. But hopefully, my dad will have quite a few!
LA :)
Monday, March 9, 2009
I Hate How My Mind Works Sometimes
I've got one of those memory banks that is always thinking... "this time last year... this time last month... this time last week" etc. For happy memories, this serves me well and always brings a smile to my face. For less than happy memories, not so much!
Well, it was exactly a month ago this morning that I lost Belle. That hit me yesterday hard. I think I threw myself into finding a new horse so hard and Katie had a lot going on this past month and between these two pre-occupations, I don't think I really grieved.
I miss her.
I love Lakota! I rode him Friday... really rode him... cantered for almost an hour. He didn't even have a bit in his mouth that fit properly and he was still perfect! He loves attention, enjoys just hanging out. I don't think he thinks he is a horse until someone gets on him. He stands perfectly still when you are grooming him and tacking him up.
Since he is a gelding (boy), his reactions are far different. If something has him worried or upset, his nostrils flair and his breathing increases and sometimes he snorts. I've been told this is very common for geldings. With mares (girls), they will just flip their lid with no warning.
I like having a warning!
But there is part of me that honestly thinks at times that we still have Belle and Lakota too and then it hits me and the sadness sets in again!
Lakota is a people horse. He just loves people - he loves Katie, will follow her around like an 1100 pound puppy, loves Don and is totally submissive to him... LOVES everyone at the new farm.
But, Belle was my horse. She did things for me that she didn't/wouldn't do for others. She responded to me when she wouldn't respond to others.
I love Lakota but there will never be another Belle!
I miss her!
LA :(
Well, it was exactly a month ago this morning that I lost Belle. That hit me yesterday hard. I think I threw myself into finding a new horse so hard and Katie had a lot going on this past month and between these two pre-occupations, I don't think I really grieved.
I miss her.
I love Lakota! I rode him Friday... really rode him... cantered for almost an hour. He didn't even have a bit in his mouth that fit properly and he was still perfect! He loves attention, enjoys just hanging out. I don't think he thinks he is a horse until someone gets on him. He stands perfectly still when you are grooming him and tacking him up.
Since he is a gelding (boy), his reactions are far different. If something has him worried or upset, his nostrils flair and his breathing increases and sometimes he snorts. I've been told this is very common for geldings. With mares (girls), they will just flip their lid with no warning.
I like having a warning!
But there is part of me that honestly thinks at times that we still have Belle and Lakota too and then it hits me and the sadness sets in again!
Lakota is a people horse. He just loves people - he loves Katie, will follow her around like an 1100 pound puppy, loves Don and is totally submissive to him... LOVES everyone at the new farm.
But, Belle was my horse. She did things for me that she didn't/wouldn't do for others. She responded to me when she wouldn't respond to others.
I love Lakota but there will never be another Belle!
I miss her!
LA :(
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